This coming Sunday at church I'm playing a song that is an old favorite of mine. It is called Thankful by Caedmon's Call. When I look at artists that have inspired me to learn how to play guitar, Caedmon's is one of the top ones. In my desire to worship in spirit and truth as John 4:23 talks about, I have been thinking hard about this song and how thankful I really am.
Yesterday we had our 12 week check-up. It was very quick and pretty uneventful. For this, I am very thankful! The doc came in and listened to our baby's heartbeat through a little microphone and speaker that we could all hear. He said it was at about 174 beats per minute and that as the baby continued to grow this number would decrease. He said that all of Em's labs came back great, and he asked if we had any questions. We really didn't....so we were on our way.
It is crazy that it has been 1 month since our first appointment with the doc. It actually makes me nervous because if the next 6 go by as quickly as this month, this baby will be here before I've even processed what that really means. I've been asking a lot of my friends when it hit them that they were about to be a dad, and it has been different for everyone. Some when they first heard the heartbeat, some when the baby was delivered, some after a few weeks of no sleep. I think I'm a hybrid and each step gets me a little closer. I'm certain though, that I have no expectations as this is just a large unknown for me. I have never been so excited about something unknown in my life. I typically like to know what i'm going into before I get there...if I don't, excitement is not what I feel.
Last night, our normal tuesday night group got together to hang out and listen to a Chandler sermon. It was really good. It was number 10 in the "Path series" which is really a progressive sanctification series. It has been one of my favorite series to date. This particular sermon was the first one back in the path series after he missed several weeks with his cancer treatments. So, he recapped the first 9 sermons from the series, and then preached some out of Romans 6. The text paints this picture of what it looks like to die to sin and live in Christ. I am very thankful that Jesus saved me and that I am dead to sin. Without that, the idea of being a father would terrify me. Being alive in Christ lets me look at this with excitement and anticipation. I'm nervous, but mostly just excited!
Our next appointment is in another month...I'm sure it will be here in no time.
- Austin
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Sleep is overrated
I am new to the blogging world and I have pretty low expectations as to who would even be interested in reading this. For some reason I am having trouble falling asleep tonight, so here goes.
I have found myself praying more in the last 2 months than I ever have before. My growth in the Lord has been slow but steady since middle school. Sure I've had seasons of ups and downs, but all in all, I have been growing. It is really kind of a neat thing because in highschool I would think "Wow, the Lord has taught me so much since middle school!" I said the same in college, and now the Lord is still drawing me in and teaching me more each day. I am so grateful for how he has blessed me. I heard Derek Webb talk at a show one day about how he has been a christian for 10 or 15 years and he needs Jesus now more than he ever has because of his awareness of the depths of his needs. That the more you grow as a Christian, and the more you learn about Jesus, the greater that you understand the depths of your need for Him. The same has been very true for me.
Most people that have been in my life in the last 4 or 5 years are aware that I listen to a pastor in the Dallas area named Matt Chandler. I have listened to a lot of his sermons through these years, many of them I've heard 3 and 4 times. For some reason God has used Chandler to teach and challenge me more than ever before. I've never met him, but I feel like he is one of my close friends. My entire way of thinking has been transformed by God, through the scriptures, and often through Chandler. He preaches line by line straight through books of the Bible. I have found this to be my favorite form of teaching. I have seen Chandler at a conference in Dallas, but other than that it has all been through podcasts. Praise the Lord for this technology. I know his history, his kids names, where his wife is from....all about him. On thanksgiving, he had a seizure in his home. He was taken to the hospital where they found a brain tumor. They operated on him quickly, but they weren't able to get it all. The tumor was found to be malignant and he is now doing radiation and chemo. The whole thing has moved me to tears on multiple occasions. In the midst of it all, he has held fast to the idea that in good times and bad, God is enough. He made a video for his congregation right in the middle of this ordeal telling them that even from a guy who could lose everything in an instant....He is enough.
This has haunted me. When am I unable to say those words when things are moderately annoying? Not even bad? This statement of He is enough has challenged me since Thanksgiving. I am most definitely in what I would call a time of prosperity. I am healthy, my wife is healthy, my dogs are even healthy. We more or less have everything we want. It is so easy to proclaim right now that He is enough, but I hope and pray that if the Lord takes any or all of this away from me, my words will not waiver.
On March 4, 2006, I married Emily. She has everything good that I lack, and she has blessed me beyond belief. I most definitely married up. We work great together. It is truly an opposites attract senario. This brings us back to prayer. I have prayed for her often and regularly for years now. A few months ago, my prayers increased. I now find myself praying for her a lot during the day, often when we wake up, and always after she falls asleep and I am still awake. I now pray for her and the life growing inside of her. She is 9 weeks pregnant and our baby is due September 1, 2010. I didn't think it was possible to love her more than I already did, but going to the doctor and seeing the heartbeat of our unborn child stirred my affections for my wife like never before. It also stirred my affections for Christ like never before. 8 weeks into the pregnancy and I can see a sonogram of my child's heart beating?!? This is nuts. I have found my faith increasing through this observation and experiencing of His creation.
I am so very thankful to all of my friends and family for prayers and encouragement. My goal is to update this as baby news progresses and as I am sure to have more nights of no sleep...pondering fatherhood, friendships, and the beautiful mysteries of God. If you made it this far, I am impressed!
I have found myself praying more in the last 2 months than I ever have before. My growth in the Lord has been slow but steady since middle school. Sure I've had seasons of ups and downs, but all in all, I have been growing. It is really kind of a neat thing because in highschool I would think "Wow, the Lord has taught me so much since middle school!" I said the same in college, and now the Lord is still drawing me in and teaching me more each day. I am so grateful for how he has blessed me. I heard Derek Webb talk at a show one day about how he has been a christian for 10 or 15 years and he needs Jesus now more than he ever has because of his awareness of the depths of his needs. That the more you grow as a Christian, and the more you learn about Jesus, the greater that you understand the depths of your need for Him. The same has been very true for me.
Most people that have been in my life in the last 4 or 5 years are aware that I listen to a pastor in the Dallas area named Matt Chandler. I have listened to a lot of his sermons through these years, many of them I've heard 3 and 4 times. For some reason God has used Chandler to teach and challenge me more than ever before. I've never met him, but I feel like he is one of my close friends. My entire way of thinking has been transformed by God, through the scriptures, and often through Chandler. He preaches line by line straight through books of the Bible. I have found this to be my favorite form of teaching. I have seen Chandler at a conference in Dallas, but other than that it has all been through podcasts. Praise the Lord for this technology. I know his history, his kids names, where his wife is from....all about him. On thanksgiving, he had a seizure in his home. He was taken to the hospital where they found a brain tumor. They operated on him quickly, but they weren't able to get it all. The tumor was found to be malignant and he is now doing radiation and chemo. The whole thing has moved me to tears on multiple occasions. In the midst of it all, he has held fast to the idea that in good times and bad, God is enough. He made a video for his congregation right in the middle of this ordeal telling them that even from a guy who could lose everything in an instant....He is enough.
This has haunted me. When am I unable to say those words when things are moderately annoying? Not even bad? This statement of He is enough has challenged me since Thanksgiving. I am most definitely in what I would call a time of prosperity. I am healthy, my wife is healthy, my dogs are even healthy. We more or less have everything we want. It is so easy to proclaim right now that He is enough, but I hope and pray that if the Lord takes any or all of this away from me, my words will not waiver.
On March 4, 2006, I married Emily. She has everything good that I lack, and she has blessed me beyond belief. I most definitely married up. We work great together. It is truly an opposites attract senario. This brings us back to prayer. I have prayed for her often and regularly for years now. A few months ago, my prayers increased. I now find myself praying for her a lot during the day, often when we wake up, and always after she falls asleep and I am still awake. I now pray for her and the life growing inside of her. She is 9 weeks pregnant and our baby is due September 1, 2010. I didn't think it was possible to love her more than I already did, but going to the doctor and seeing the heartbeat of our unborn child stirred my affections for my wife like never before. It also stirred my affections for Christ like never before. 8 weeks into the pregnancy and I can see a sonogram of my child's heart beating?!? This is nuts. I have found my faith increasing through this observation and experiencing of His creation.
I am so very thankful to all of my friends and family for prayers and encouragement. My goal is to update this as baby news progresses and as I am sure to have more nights of no sleep...pondering fatherhood, friendships, and the beautiful mysteries of God. If you made it this far, I am impressed!
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